Today ended up being a good day. Mornings are always rough for me. But now, around 6, perfect time of day. Everything is so peaceful. You can feel the world winding down as everything begins to close. Even traffic isn't so bad. Getting home around this time is actually nice.
"Ruth! Honey I'm home." I can smell the chicken and potatoes. Heading to the the bedroom, I begin loosing my tie. Ah, being able to sit down feels really good. Ruth comes in and takes off my shoes. "Hello sweetie, how was your day?" She sits next to me and leans in to kiss my cheek. Taking a look at my wife, I remember when we first met. Sophomore year in college, both of us young, full of life. She was so beautiful. The sparkle in her eye is what swept me away. There was no question this was the woman I was going spend my life with. She was beautiful, intelligent, strong. But... after the pregnancy... after Joseph's death... I could never look at her the same. "My day was the same as normal." Suddenly agitated, I rose and headed to the bathroom. "Honey, it's such a nice day." That I had to agree with. "Do you want to go on a walk?" I asked. Great, this can shut her up and get me out of this house. No matter how big I built it, it always seems to get smaller the more alone we are. "That sounds like a great idea. I'll put the food in the oven."
We get in the car and drive to the park. Living outside the city can get pretty annoying. But I'm not going to let anything ruin this night. That is the last thing that I need. We get out and I grab Ruth's hand. She smiles. I nod. In public, perfection always the goal. Walking through the trail always soothes me. The trees, the atmosphere, the solitude... well almost solitude. I look back over to Ruth. She's looking straight forward in a daze. I can tell she is trying to make sure she doesn't walk too fast or too slow for me. Years ago, she never used to care. We would race through the parks until we couldn't run anymore. Actually, I am still running. Ruth started crawling many years ago. Crawling to keep up. We come out to the playground. Ruth's palms begin to sweat. She knows how much I hate seeing young children. She doesn't know I come to the playground almost every week. Just sitting, watching the families come to play. I sit thinking about the life I was going to have. I'm not angry, though. I'm not going to let anything ruin this ev-What the FUCK. "What the fuck? There's a fucking naked guy on the swing." Evening is ruined. "Let's head to the car." "OK," she says.
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There were no words. There was nothing to say. All I could see before me was the fire burning. Burning everything. It was relentless. It was showed no mercy. I didn't even hear Ruth's cries. I didn't hear the ambulance pull to the house. I didn't hear the police asking what happened.
All I saw was fire.
"Ruth! Honey I'm home." I can smell the chicken and potatoes. Heading to the the bedroom, I begin loosing my tie. Ah, being able to sit down feels really good. Ruth comes in and takes off my shoes. "Hello sweetie, how was your day?" She sits next to me and leans in to kiss my cheek. Taking a look at my wife, I remember when we first met. Sophomore year in college, both of us young, full of life. She was so beautiful. The sparkle in her eye is what swept me away. There was no question this was the woman I was going spend my life with. She was beautiful, intelligent, strong. But... after the pregnancy... after Joseph's death... I could never look at her the same. "My day was the same as normal." Suddenly agitated, I rose and headed to the bathroom. "Honey, it's such a nice day." That I had to agree with. "Do you want to go on a walk?" I asked. Great, this can shut her up and get me out of this house. No matter how big I built it, it always seems to get smaller the more alone we are. "That sounds like a great idea. I'll put the food in the oven."
We get in the car and drive to the park. Living outside the city can get pretty annoying. But I'm not going to let anything ruin this night. That is the last thing that I need. We get out and I grab Ruth's hand. She smiles. I nod. In public, perfection always the goal. Walking through the trail always soothes me. The trees, the atmosphere, the solitude... well almost solitude. I look back over to Ruth. She's looking straight forward in a daze. I can tell she is trying to make sure she doesn't walk too fast or too slow for me. Years ago, she never used to care. We would race through the parks until we couldn't run anymore. Actually, I am still running. Ruth started crawling many years ago. Crawling to keep up. We come out to the playground. Ruth's palms begin to sweat. She knows how much I hate seeing young children. She doesn't know I come to the playground almost every week. Just sitting, watching the families come to play. I sit thinking about the life I was going to have. I'm not angry, though. I'm not going to let anything ruin this ev-What the FUCK. "What the fuck? There's a fucking naked guy on the swing." Evening is ruined. "Let's head to the car." "OK," she says.
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There were no words. There was nothing to say. All I could see before me was the fire burning. Burning everything. It was relentless. It was showed no mercy. I didn't even hear Ruth's cries. I didn't hear the ambulance pull to the house. I didn't hear the police asking what happened.
All I saw was fire.
